Football Mom...sort of

Okay, so back when we figured out that the boys' eye condition was pretty serious, our amazing eye doctor, Dr. Suh, told us that the boys should never be in any contact sports. Again, this was when they were like, four and five, and it just didn't really seem like THAT big of a deal, right? WRONG!!

JT's love for football began on the playground at school during recesses. Seemed innocent. I was pretty sure they wouldn't hurt each other too bad...and it's supposed to just be TOUCH football. Don't think I don't realize that there were an awful lot of tackles in 'recess TOUCH football'...but it didn't worry me too much. However, I just thought he was having fun, I didn't realize that he was learning everything he could about the game!! And LOVING it!! At the end of sixth grade, Coach Klemp told the boys that if they were interested in playing, they should come and talk to him. JT is a lot like his Dad, when something is bothering him, he's not a big talker...just gets quiet. Well, that night when he came home from school, he was VERY quiet. I couldn't get a word out of him, which is rare for me, because I can get a word out of almost anyone. (it's a gift) Finally as I dug at him he told me how upset he was that he couldn't play football, and proceeded to beg me to let him.

What do you do, when you see this boy that you love more than anything, staring at you with huge, desperate, bright blue eyes?? It wasn't that JT wasn't CAPABLE of playing the game, in fact he was a great kicker, he's a good thrower, he had the size, and the ability!! The eye doctor told us that one good knock to the head could detach his retinas just like that. I'm sorry, but there is a lot of head knocking happening out there on that football field, even in the lower grades!! John was all for him trying. I was...not. Not in the least, actually. However, I talked to my Mom, and she kind of made me feel like I couldn't put him in a bubble just because I wanted to. He had to be able to have opportunities...you can't really live life if you base it on 'what if's'. JT and John kept saying things like, 'I could fall down walking to school and have the same thing happen!'..So, finally, I talked to Coach Klemp, and I asked him to just give him a position like, kicker. Can't touch the kicker, right??

I went to that first game, sick. I mean, SICK...terrified. What if....what if....what if...was all that was going through my mind as I watched my little boy (who I noticed was really not that little) have the best time of his LIFE. He ended up playing a lot more than kicker!! But, he just loved it. How could I deny him that?

Well, I denied Ben. Ben wanted to play so bad in 7th grade, but because we weren't just dealing with the eye scare, we were also dealing with spondylolysthesis, and JRA, I told him absolutely not. I pointed him towards manager where he got teased by the other kids, and called 'sissy' names. I don't know if they knew why he wasn't out there. Ben doesn't really like to tell people what he can't do, which I find to be totally admirable. Anyway, this year, I caved...again, very reluctantly, but with John totally on board! I went to his games and watched as he jumped up time after time. He played both offense and defense, and didn't spend much time out of the game! He doesn't have the size that JT has and that made it a little more scary for me, but if Ben had any fear out there, you wouldn't have known it.

Through the fear of the dreaded 'what if's'...I am so very proud of BOTH of my football boys.

However, at the games you probably aren't hearing me yell, because no matter how hard I try, I don't understand the rules of that damned game...and also because I tend to yell things like, "RUN THE OTHER WAY!!" "GET OUT OF THERE!!" and when they crawl out of a heap I want to yell things like, "CAN YOU STILL SEE ME NOW???" "HOW MANY FINGERS AM I HOLDING UP?!?!"

One day this mom was screaming at her kid, "GET UP! SHAKE IT OFF! You're FINE...GET BACK IN THERE!!" and here the poor baby had broken his ankle! I think if that is what a football mom says, I'm okay with never being one!

I have been sworn to silence in the stands by JT and Ben. One time I yelled, "GO JT!" which I found to be totally harmless, but as soon as the words were out of my mouth, his head just dropped, and one of his friends patted him on the shoulder as if to say, "It'll be okay..." and I realized that you can't yell, "GO JT!" when the game hasn't even started yet. Apparently it's just not 'cool'. I am learning as I go!

I talked about finding blessings last time, and how you have to look for them. Well, the blessing in this is very evident. My boys have made it through another football season unharmed. What an amazing blessing that is!! I believe that they are each on that field with an angel on their shoulder keeping them safe. I am learning to be less freaked out by the games, and that, too, is a huge blessing. AND, it gives John and I something to do together that we both WANT to do...and that's more of a MIRACLE! (nothing has to get shot...and nobody has to scrapbook...)

GO HAWKS!